You Know...

It's dark in this valley, really, I can't see the sky, spite the trees. I wouldn't fall so easy, maybe, if I would just stay down on my knees. And now I'm alone, really, alone as my eyes can see. I wouldn't feel so alone, maybe, if I would just stay down on my knees. Now I sit with my head in my hands, and I stare at this tear-stained sand. Don't you know man, I heard what you said, but it got lost in the space in my head. So you say that you know, and the harder you try, the lower you go. But you know there's a cure that'll take it away. And you say that you know, you say that you feel, I know in my heart that there is something more real. It's sweet in your mouth but you wont spit it out, so now its going to burn you from the inside out. But you say it's taking the pain away...
--Pivitplex, "You Know"

"In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith — of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire — may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed." --1 Peter 1:6-7

So this was just so awesome that I had to share it with you. As anyone who could care less about me knows, in these past couple of months, all those things God promised me 2 or so years ago are actually happening. All the stuff He told me He was gonna do, He did. All the stuff He said I was gonna do, I'm starting to do. All the stuff He said He was gonna give me, He gave me. Save one. It just so happens to be the one I wanted the most, while watching everyone around me get this thing I wanted while I still don't have it. Now that's an issue I'll get to in another blog at another time, but for now, I'm just focusing on this issue. This latest rub-in-the-face... let's just say it was acquired by less than honest means... that's all that really needs to be said about it, I suppose... that it was acquired without God's direction or approval. I know it, everyone who saw it actually happen knows it, but anyone looking at it from the outside may not. And I guess that in looking at this latest rub-in-the-face while it's rubbed in my face, I kinda forgot that. I kinda started looking at this ungodly, dishonestly-acquired thing and telling God, "It's not fair. I did the right thing, I'm doing what You told me, I could've taken it dishonestly when I had the chance, but I didn't... so why is it that the ones who blatantly defied You and did exactly the opposite of what You told them are getting what I wanted?" I had barely finished that sentence before He hit me with an answer that totally flipped my brain upside-down. As I explain, I'm sure the parallels will hit you just like they hit me before I even get to an explanation...

An image of that ungodly, dishonestly-acquired thing immediately popped into my head, and He said of it, "That's a cheap imitation. I've got the real thing coming for you."

The next picture was of two fancy gold rings, one on my hand that represented the real thing, and the other sitting on a small round wooden table that represented the cheap imitation. He said, "At first glance, they may look the same..." and at a slight glance, they kinda did. He continued, "...but look closer." I looked at the one on my hand... it was bright, brilliant, perfectly crafted, perfectly colored, flawlessly fashioned, and it was as if the real-ness and the true-ness of it just radiated off it in a way that let you know just by looking that this was real, true, perfect gold. There was no mistaking it. He said of the real thing, "The perfection isn't just at the surface. Cutting into it, you'll clearly see that it's gold all the way through down to the very bottom." The ring started to split open, revealing the inside to be totally solid gold, there was nothing in there but that same pure, perfect gold. "It's the same, inside and out. What you see is what it is. This is real, and there's no denying it, no matter how deep you look." The split closed itself up so tightly that there was absolutely no seam, it went back to being a perfectly smooth, perfectly polished surface, with absolutely no indication that there was ever a split at all. He said, "When splits happen, it's so strong, so pliable yet durable, that it can be repaired as if the split never happened."

Then He pointed out the cheap imitation sitting on the table, and He said of that one, "But this one is only gold on the surface. It's only the color of gold, it's not even real gold." Looking at the cheap imitation more closely, it became more noticeable that it was a different color that the real thing. It was more faded, not as golden, the color nowhere near as bright and brilliant as the real thing, nowhere near as shiny, smooth, or polished as the real thing. Looking even closer, it was clearly visible that the golden color on the outside was starting to chip, scratch, and wear away around the edges, revealing a dark gray material underneath that seemed more like plastic than any kind of metal. He said of the condition of the cheap imitation, "Because it's not real, it won't last. It won't stand up to the wear and tear that the real thing can handle. It'll chip away more and more, making it easier to see from farther away and with less effort that it's not real. Over time, what makes it appear to be gold will fall away, revealing what it truly is. Something of no real value that can't stand up to what it needs to. Something I would never create." Good point. The cheap imitation started to split open the same way, revealing that gray plastic-metal hybrid it was made of just under the surface, and He said about it, "Looking deep into this, you'll quickly see this isn't what it appears to be. You'll quickly see that beneath the surface is something cheap, undesirable, something that wouldn't have otherwise been used for anything if it hadn't been plastered in something else to make it look like it was gold." The split in the cheap imitation began to close up, but with a visible mark in the surface where the split was. He said about it, "Because it's weak, frail, and impure, the splits that happen will always be apparent because it's impurities, weaknesses, and frailties prevent it from ever being repaired all the way."

The next picture was of the real ring from my hand in the middle of a fire. He said, "The fire burns away any impurities in the real thing, and it comes out of the fire soft and moldable, something I can make into anything, into any shape I want it to be." The fire died down, leaving the real ring glowing hot, and He picked it up with His hands and started to reshape it. It was still a ring, but now, after He was done with it, it had been made into a ring more fancy, more elaborate, more intricately designed than it was to begin with. It immediately cooled down, revealing that perfect shine again, and He put it back on my hand. Then He said, "The cheap imitation, when put into the fire, becomes nothing but ashes, useless to make anything, destroyed." Then there was the cheap imitation in the fire, and it quickly burst into flames. The fake gold layer on the outside burned away instantly leaving no trace behind, the plastic-metal hybrid quickly burned away into a pile of ashes as the fire died down, and then wind began to blow over the ashes, blowing them completely away, leaving nothing but a burned mark on the table where the cheap imitation had been sitting.

All it took was watching that illustration, and I got His point. And I think you do, too. So now, I gotta ask me... and maybe you might be asking you, too... when you see someone else get what you wanted, "dishonestly acquired" without God, what reason do I have to be sad? What do I have to envy? What is there about it to want? Cheapness? Fake-ness? A situation God's hands aren't in? All the trouble that comes with it? And having to live with knowing God warned all along, "Don't do it!!" and it was done anyway despite all His warning, so all that trouble is completely deserved? Nah. I'm good. :-)

And I do have to admit... just a few days ago, I saw they who dishonestly acquired what I wanted. They looked at me and waited for me to be sad. But instead, there was peace in looking back at them, remembering the rings and His words, seeing it in a whole new light, and thinking, "Yep. Cheap imitation."